Aw Shit

Mondays are overwhelming. I don’t like them.

I’m not a prejudiced person, so the fact that I dislike Mondays to the extent that I do had me concerned.

Let’s think about this…..

I don’t think it’s Monday’s fault that I don’t like it. I think it’s Sunday’s fault. And to be honest, I’m not a huge fan of Sundays either.

I think that Tuesdays are actually the official start of the emotion of our week. You heard me right, I said Tuesday.

Tuesday

You are already in the frame of mind to get shit done and know you’ll eventually end up at the weekend if you work hard enough.

Wednesday

HUMP DAY. Who doesn’t like a day that instantly makes you think of sex? Come on, you know you do. No one cares that it ACTUALLY refers to getting over the hump of the middle of the week. We are talking down and dirty, hump your desk leg, can’t wait till Friday HUMP DAY.

Thursday

This is the day of the week where we actually start our mental vacation. It’s so close to Friday that we get a contact high and can’t think of anything other than what we plan on doing the following night (drinking, sex, pole dancing, robbing a liquor store, whatever).

Friday 

Need I say more? 

Saturday

It’s a second chance at Friday. Don’t blow it.

Sunday

Sunday is what I like to call my “aw shit” day. You know what I’m talking about. “Aw shit” I need to make that appointment. Oh well, it’s Sunday so I’ll have to do it tomorrow. “Aw shit” I need to call so-and-so. Oh well, it’s Sunday so I’ll have to do it tomorrow. All day I’m saying “aw shit”.

Monday

So by no fault of its own, Monday is completely fucking set up by Sunday EVERY TIME. Sunday is a slick little bastard. Monday would be just like a Tuesday had Sunday not pushed all it’s “shit to do” in Monday’s lap.

Just think about that for a moment people, just think about that.

You’re welcome!